There are many people who "live" online. They are online all the time, they never leave chat rooms, messengers etc. A mail sent at 4 am is often answered immediately. Do these folks have NO life? or is there something more to it all. Most online chatters and users are healthy and happy folks, who come in to chat a while and email friends and family, play some games, or research something online.
There are groups of users though who go beyond that and they seem to be in 2 groups; group one includes individuals who have all the time in the world to annoy and pester. They may have a website that they use to spout hate, booters, or other antisocial items. Then there is group two, comprised of people who also seem to have all the time in the world to be online, but use the time productively. They may help in the help rooms, or have active websites for friends, family, organizations and sometimes self. Now important factor here is to realize that the people in group one.. may seem nice, friendly and ever so patient and group two may appear abrupt or impatient. Often there may be some overlap as well, seemingly nice chatters who have hate pages, and seemingly rude chatters who are actually very helpful. Be aware that abusers/ stalkers/ harassers are consummate manipulators, jealous and are targeting you for a real or imagines slight. The subtle differences can be seen only via long term observation. So for the average user? Just remember that everyone who helps you out of a mess may not be your friend, and watch who speaks poorly about others. The malcontents may seem very helpful, but you should be cautious of those who have issues and speak poorly of others. But then again, everyone is entitled to bad days. Take it all with a grain of salt, check sites, use Google, and decide for yourself..... Keep in mind that many masterful stalkers and harassers will attempt to justify their actions with persecutory and/or grandiose delusions. They are often masterful manipulators who will cry loudly and profusely of their victimization. In group settings the clever abuser will befriend those who are not friendly with his target and utilize them to stalk and harass his victim as well. Long term and persistent abusers will make up reasons to justify their abuse and will do anything to provoke you to further attempt to shift the blame to you. So if you see abuse, or are abused....... DOCUMENT! IGNORE! FILTER! and BLOCK!
Cyberstalking and online harassment are just an extension of the old power and control cycle that most abusers user. Harassers will use several techniques to try and control the victim ~ They will attempt to isolate their victim, to control who you speak too, email, chat with, and where and when you chat or use the computer. The abuser will often post false statements in chats, forums, emails, spam their victim, or post their information on a public forum so they are inundated with email or messages. Additionally they pretend they are their victim, cloning ( making visually similar ids) and will abuse others who do not realize the differences. Stalkers will emotionally and financially abuse their victims ~ from trying mind games, harassing or derogatory statements, to threats to their livelihood. Stalkers and harassers will minimize the situation and will attempt to blame the person they are harassing and stalking. This is an extension of the "vendetta" excuse, a punishment for some real or imagined slight. Online abuse may not follow the same cycle exactly as "real life" stalking and harassment, the victims can discern a pattern over time, but realize that online abuse is just as real and horrific as real life physical abuse.
So what to do when you get harassed or annoyed or stalked online? Realize that you often can do nothing and become the target of a stalker or harasser. You can sit quietly in chat and become a target, or you can speak to the wrong person and end up harassed DAILY and CONSTANTLY. One line of defense is knowing what to do. It is more than knowing who to tell... you need to know how to document the abuse and protect yourself. Start with protecting yourself. Check your online profiles and make sure that you have no personal real information on them. If the chat server ( like yahoo) has a space for alternate email address, make sure that is current at all times, this is where your new password goes if you request it..... make sure its current and VERIFY IT!! Make sure you have a great password!! use a password generator, grab the random code yahoo mail generates, or whatever tool you chose... BACK up the passwords to a text file..... and save to a floppy.. print it out.... put it SOMEWHERE safe as well. Have a firewall and antivirus on your computer. There are several free of both, and no excuse to not have both current. Firewalls will protect you from random port attacks and hack attempts, and an antivirus protects your mail and your computer from malicious email... intended or not...... SIDE NOTE HERE>> if you private message with strangers or cam with strangers on yahoo, you risk a peer to peer connection on your computer ? this means a DIRECT CONNECTION and your computers ip becomes known to the other user. be careful. Communicate with companies who you do business with and let them know the situation. Establish a secondary non-public email for working, and if your email is spammed, and you receive unwanted mail, contact the companies, most e-zines and online forums will send the originating email or request with the offenders ip and computer name. They will also flag the details for legal reasons. So don't just toss the spam.... check it out.. those email ips can often give you the final evidence you need. Be prepared to save! Not all chats have the ability to save transcripts, so you need a back up system. Realize that the transcripts are not always considered a legal document, but you can use to show a pattern of behavior. Now~ test this before you need it!! think of it as your online safety plan. - Find out how to save the text on that chat you use. /save works in some....... but even if you can save the text files, do screen captures.
- Screen captures can show color, font, client used, a variety of information that plain text cant.
- TIP> do a FULL screen capture, include the clock.. mouse over it to show date.... or post the date and time in the room. then IMMEDIATELY ZIP the file and upload it to a server.
- Don't EDIT OR ACCESS IT>>> just save it...... the date and time uploaded is noted in the ftp/server logs and you can copy that.. and law enforcement or others can compare to the images in the zip files date and time.
Contact the authorities where you live and share the information you have saved. The screen captures and transcripts will help you to file charges if need be. Follow the chain of command, local police, FBI, then Interpol is the offender is in Europe.
Contact your local police department, contact the FBI, and contact the local district attorney. If you do know who is harassing you online, and know where they live, you should also contact the local police/ authorities there. International cases will often be passed to Interpol. Take care to flag any email that is also harassing in nature, and immediately call FBI if any threat of injury or death is made. No matter who you get involved, remember that your actions will also be watched as they observe and gather additional materials to prosecute the stalkers. So try not to react, do make sure you have the KNOWN ids on ignore, and make reasonable efforts to stay clear of them. Remember, most stalkers are arrogant, self centered, masterful manipulators, jealous and are targeting you for a real or imagines slight. Be very careful ! These people will do anything to attempt to justify their persecutory and/or grandiose delusions. Realize that their role in this is as a "victim" and they will see all actions on your part as vindication of their delusions. BE CAREFUL. IGNORE, BLOCK, FILTER!! and most of all DOCUMENT!! | 